Thursday, March 3, 2011 Today I’m grateful that: So many friends and family came out on a cold, crisp day in Maryland to pay tribute to one of my husband’s best friends, Adam, who passed away suddenly a few days ago at the far too early age of 35. I believe Adam’s parents received some level of comfort being surrounded, literally, by so many people who also loved Adam. Chad was able to hold it together to deliver his eulogy to Adam. I don’t know that I would have been able to be as strong as Chad was today. I’m grateful that Chad was able to somehow find and speak such beautiful words to convey perfectly the kind of person and friend that Adam was. Below are the words of Chad’s eulogy of Adam… When I first started putting these words down, I kept getting mad at myself for not remembering specific quotes or every detail of a particular scene. But then I thought “Hey, that was Adam’s job!”Adam was so good at remembering; I’d often email or call him to try to remember details of what happened in MY own life. While he takes with him a big piece of my heart, he also takes with me a piece of my own memory, because I grew so accustomed to leaning on his. I remember the day Adam graduated with two degrees faster than I graduated with one. He chose to not wear any pants under his gown, and thoroughly enjoyed telling me that vital piece of information. For someone with such a great laugh, that was perhaps the best one I’d ever heard him share. One part happy and proud of earning the first of many degrees he would go on to earn, and the other part thoroughly enjoying being just a little bit devious and living life in the moment. Adam loved to tease. He LOVED to tease me about how long I took to graduate, or about any number of predicaments I found myself in that he often witnessed firsthand. But, because it was Adam, it never ever got under my skin. He had a way of laughing when he teased you that reassured you he really did care about you and was happy to be part of all of your adventures. I loved WATCHING Adam listen. He wouldn’t just sit there and nod. You could actually see his whole body turn, or shake, or contort and really ABSORB what you were telling him. Adam was the best resume editor I’ve ever met. And unfortunately for him, I put that skill to the test. A lot. I can only imagine how many resumes, cover letters, technical documents, legal briefs articles and papers he was asked to edit for people over the years. Every time he would put his attention to what he was editing, the subject matter got better. His edits were so good, and so thoughtful that they actually made the people who originally created the document a little better too. And in reading all of the outpouring of sympathy, and special memories on Facebook it’s clear that Adam treated his friends like he treated his editing, with focus, perspective and a strong desire to bring out the best in them. Adam appreciated those who he benefited from, and made sure to give back. I believe that’s why he committed so much of his time and energy to giving back to the young journalists and editors at school newspapers at Maryland. That’s also why he was so committed to his friends, because he appreciated what others had given him, and in return he gave back even more. Adam’s been there with me and for me. We’ve been through tremendous highs and lows together, and more than our fair share of the absurd. These facts do not make me unique, but rather one of a fortunate and sizable group of people who have benefited in innumerable ways from knowing him. Those benefits do not end here, they only deepen in focus and meaning. Adam, I will miss you always and laugh and cry at the same time when I think of you. You taught me the wonderful saying from one of your favorite writers, Hunter S. Thompson, who said “Buy the ticket, take the ride.”  Though the ride was way too short, I’m a better man for having taken it with you. Mahalo. - Chad Capellman

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Today I’m grateful that:

  • So many friends and family came out on a cold, crisp day in Maryland to pay tribute to one of my husband’s best friends, Adam, who passed away suddenly a few days ago at the far too early age of 35. I believe Adam’s parents received some level of comfort being surrounded, literally, by so many people who also loved Adam.
  • Chad was able to hold it together to deliver his eulogy to Adam. I don’t know that I would have been able to be as strong as Chad was today. I’m grateful that Chad was able to somehow find and speak such beautiful words to convey perfectly the kind of person and friend that Adam was.

Below are the words of Chad’s eulogy of Adam…

When I first started putting these words down, I kept getting mad at myself for not remembering specific quotes or every detail of a particular scene. But then I thought “Hey, that was Adam’s job!”Adam was so good at remembering; I’d often email or call him to try to remember details of what happened in MY own life. While he takes with him a big piece of my heart, he also takes with me a piece of my own memory, because I grew so accustomed to leaning on his.

I remember the day Adam graduated with two degrees faster than I graduated with one. He chose to not wear any pants under his gown, and thoroughly enjoyed telling me that vital piece of information. For someone with such a great laugh, that was perhaps the best one I’d ever heard him share. One part happy and proud of earning the first of many degrees he would go on to earn, and the other part thoroughly enjoying being just a little bit devious and living life in the moment.

Adam loved to tease. He LOVED to tease me about how long I took to graduate, or about any number of predicaments I found myself in that he often witnessed firsthand. But, because it was Adam, it never ever got under my skin. He had a way of laughing when he teased you that reassured you he really did care about you and was happy to be part of all of your adventures.

I loved WATCHING Adam listen. He wouldn’t just sit there and nod. You could actually see his whole body turn, or shake, or contort and really ABSORB what you were telling him.

Adam was the best resume editor I’ve ever met. And unfortunately for him, I put that skill to the test. A lot. I can only imagine how many resumes, cover letters, technical documents, legal briefs articles and papers he was asked to edit for people over the years.

Every time he would put his attention to what he was editing, the subject matter got better. His edits were so good, and so thoughtful that they actually made the people who originally created the document a little better too. And in reading all of the outpouring of sympathy, and special memories on Facebook it’s clear that Adam treated his friends like he treated his editing, with focus, perspective and a strong desire to bring out the best in them.

Adam appreciated those who he benefited from, and made sure to give back. I believe that’s why he committed so much of his time and energy to giving back to the young journalists and editors at school newspapers at Maryland.

That’s also why he was so committed to his friends, because he appreciated what others had given him, and in return he gave back even more.

Adam’s been there with me and for me. We’ve been through tremendous highs and lows together, and more than our fair share of the absurd. These facts do not make me unique, but rather one of a fortunate and sizable group of people who have benefited in innumerable ways from knowing him. Those benefits do not end here, they only deepen in focus and meaning. Adam, I will miss you always and laugh and cry at the same time when I think of you. You taught me the wonderful saying from one of your favorite writers, Hunter S. Thompson, who said “Buy the ticket, take the ride.”  Though the ride was way too short, I’m a better man for having taken it with you.

Mahalo.

- Chad Capellman